Monday, April 30, 2007

I Drank Draft Beer Whilst Watching The Draft

Pre-post "throat clearing": I find I really like the word "whilst". I think Brick Top in Guy Ritchie's last good film is to blame for this, but I'm willing to attribute it to the fact that at least 2-3x per year I've faked either an Irish, Scottish or English accent in bars because, as reported in the New England Journal of Medicine, chicks dig guys with accents.

So the NFL Draft was this weekend, and because I A. forgot to take a draft of the short story I'm working on with me back to Athens and B. I was feeling lethargic as hell (plus peeling from a previous weekend's lopsided sunburn), I ended up watching a decent portion of the first-round live.

General (non-ATL, UGA-related) Thoughts:
1. There is a media bias, and it's not right-wing or left-wing, it's: ESPN his their entire collective head up Notre Dame's ass. There must be a marketing/advertising report out there that claims not only does ND have the most alumni, but they're all somehow filthy rich. How else can you explain a late first-round pick QB getting more coverage than the guy picked #1 overall (and who was shown, on video, throwing the ball 60 yards with one knee on the ground)?
2. Brady Quinn is apparently "model gorgeous" (I forget which talking head specifically made the reference, and you can supply the jokes), and once he signs his contract with the Browns, a millinaire. And yet I feel more like a badass today. Why? I can't throw a football for shit, I get paid in the (low--but only for now) five-figures, have no six-pack (again, for now), can't bench 220 at all, much less for multiple reps...and yet several of the girls I've dated are far hotter than Brady Quinn's girlfriend. (And yes, I know it's not all about looks...but ESPN had yet to interview her, so I don't know if she's funnier or smarter than some of my exes...but were I a betting man, and Vegas bored enough to place odds, I'd say no, she's not.)
3. The Dolphins picked Ted Ginn Jr.? Seriously? No wonder Nick Saban left.
4. The Red Sox took 2 out of 3 in the Bronx (ok, not football related, but still cool)

Falcons/UGA thoughts:
1. I hate the Redskins and wish them ill. Landry was supposed to go to ATL at 8, then the Falcons could grab Charles Johnson with their 2nd second round pick. They'd have a badass safety, a good DE and the big dude from Texas. Instead they have a DE that probably wasn't worth the 8th pick, a safety taken late on Sunday from Maine (you need safety help and you wait until late Sunday to get one? And he played at friggin' Maine?) Plus the dude from Texas.
2. The lineman from Texas=best pick the Falcons made all day. Big, mean, and fills a need.
3. The Pats got Randy Moss (!) for a 4th pick. The Falcons draft a WR from a college I've never heard. And I ask: why?
4. Houston at CB/Nickel, Jimmy Williams to safety? That could work. Though with Carolina drafting Dwayne Jarret Houston better hope he can match up with Steve Smith. 4.32 40 or not, freakish number of reps at 220 (despite being 185) notwithstanding, giving up half a foot to a WR can hurt. All told the first three picks=pretty good, the rest=head scratching.
5. TE isn't a postition of need, so the Falcons draft: a TE. Sure, I'm glad a UGA player was picked...but it reminds me too much of the Dan Reeves all TE drafts.
6. Calvin Johnson to Detroit is really the best news for the Falcons. CJ in Tampa Bay was trouble. Detroit is a good fit for the kid too, as Mike Martz is pretty much the GT offense under Gailey's antithesis--and if a converted safety like Mike Furrey could put up numbers in the offense...
7. Q-Mo was drafted ahead of Charles Johnson after all. Perhaps some of those "he's a sure 1st rounder" folks from a year ago came to their senses. Or they're Faulkner fans and wanted a player named Quentin. But probably the first reason.

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